A Local Wedding

Several weeks ago I ran into a lady in the stairwell of my building. She was highly interested in me since I’m an American and an English speaker and she happens to be a local English teacher. I have seen her a couple more times and then early last week, she invited me to her daughter’s wedding. I learned the date of the wedding but didn’t learn the time or location. She had discussed it with my neighbor and said I could tag along with the neighbor if I wanted to come. I didn’t see her or my neighbor the rest of the week so I wasn’t planning on going to the wedding since I didn’t have enough info.

At 6:00 pm, I was bagging up my trash to set it in the stairwell for the door guy to pick up and heard my neighbor in the hallway. I decided to see if I could catch her. She asked if I still wanted to go to the wedding. I found out it was supposed to start around 8:30 pm. My neighbor told me she had been really ill, so ill in fact that she was at the hospital the night before getting an iv of fluids. She said she was going to lay down and rest and if she felt good enough to go to the wedding she would knock on my door. She came by around 7:40 and asked if I could be ready by 8. I got dressed and waited and waited and waited. I was beginning to think I had misunderstood and maybe she really wasn’t going after all when she knocked on my door at 9:00. So the wedding was supposed to start at 8:30 and we didn’t leave until 9:00. 

On the drive to the wedding hall, my neighbor’s husband was asking about American weddings, only he was talking really loud so I could understand better. Ha! I love it! I had worn the only pair of heels I own since people tend to dress fancy here and it was a wedding after all. Even though I’m a novice heel wearer, I can manage these pretty well. I didn’t take into account the cobblestone-esque streets. As I was walking, I kept asking God to help me not trip or break an ankle. We arrived at the wedding hall seconds before the bride and groom made their entrance. I literally had to squeeze up against the family members so I wasn’t in the bride and groom’s way. Awkward. 

The event began with the bride and groom having a solo dance. After the solo dance, couples joined them in a slow dance. After the slow dance, they started a big group dance. The bride’s mom, who had invited me, asked me to go join in the dancing. I am a terrible dancer. I hate it. I have no idea what to do with my body. I kept thinking of the Will Ferrell movie where he says, “I don’t know what to do with my hands.” In the midst of dancing and super loud music, the mom kept introducing me to people and telling them I was from America and then telling me what they did for a living. I felt a bit like her trophy she was showing off to important friends. 

I was able to take a break from dancing because after that song, which lasted about 20 minutes, the bride’s friends did a special dance. After that, they wheeled out a giant cake which stood about 3 feet high. The couple cut the cake and they wheeled it back out. They then served us some cake and a juice box. After the cake cutting/eating, close friends and relatives stood in line to pin gifts of gold/jewelry on the bride and groom. I asked my neighbors about it and told them in America we usually buy gifts for the home. They said that’s what they had done for this couple. They said only the closest friends and family pin gifts on the bride and groom. I also learned that this was a basic wedding. There are also more luxurious weddings where people dress much nicer and there is a meal. I think the couple had already had a wedding in one of the larger cities. 

After the gift pinning, the bride and groom exited for a wardrobe change. In the meantime, it looked like all of the grandmothers did a little dance. When the bride and groom were changed, they cut the lights off and females came in with lit candles and a tray with candles and henna. I learned from my neighbor that it was time for the henna to be applied. She walked me up to the front so I could see better and get some pics. I could not believe the ladies were dancing around with open flames. The mother of the bride almost had her dress caught on fire. A lady saw me taking pics and handed me a candle and told me to get in the dancing circle. I kept noticing the ladies trading out the tray and in turn they would wave it over the couple’s head. Finally one of the older ladies took the tray and put henna on the bride. Then she turned to the groom and it seemed like he was refusing her for a while but finally she put henna on him as well. I was grateful when that part was over because the open flames were making me nervous.

Henna with candles

Henna attire, henna being applied

I wasn't lying about the big ole flames
being danced around

After the henna, they got back to dancing. I was thankful when my neighbor told me they were leaving early since they get bored of just watching dancing. I really like both of them and am so grateful for the way they took care of me and explained what was going on. The husband would also ask for 2 of each party favor so I could use one at the wedding and have one as a souvenir. The wife acted like a loving mom to me, putting her hand on my back to guide me in the streets and at the wedding. I’m thankful for them.

Gifts: nuts, henna, chocolate, and a scarf to wave while dancing

My sweet neighbor