The toothbrush did it. I had been keeping my cool about this whole move until I packed away my toothbrush. There is something so final about removing a toothbrush from a home. Well, it was the toothbrush and the text yesterday from my original roommate in this home. She said it was sad to think of all of her memories of me in this apartment and how I won’t be here in the future.
The toothbrush and text started me thinking of all the sweet memories from this home. Eight years. This place has been my home for EIGHT years. I gave in and let the tears flow. They were mostly tears of joy thanking God for this sweet gift and all the laughter, all the prayers prayed, all the growth in myself and others, all the ministry that has taken place in this home. It has been a treasure.
I remember visiting a friend’s house many years ago and commenting on how her home was so peaceful. She told me when she was looking for a place to rent she prayed for a place that would be peaceful and would be her sanctuary. I did this same thing as I apartment hunted and found what has turned out to be my own little apartment sanctuary.
So here I am 8 years later and basking in all the Lord has accomplished and humbled that He would choose to use this space and this servant to do it. I’m also leaving this place a bit grief-stricken but mostly eager to see Him do it all yet again in my new home. I’m hoping for another sanctuary home, a city on a hill, a place of laughter and love, a place where I can pray for others, and a place to encourage and be encouraged. I’m eager to see all the growth the Lord does in my own heart and the hearts of those around me.
I am also encouraged as I reflect back on these 8 years realizing that I somehow managed to accomplish my purpose. I have good friends who do ministry in an international setting. They constantly say that they’re not superheroes of the faith but rather they’re simply living out their lives exactly as anyone living in the States should live. They go to work, they raise their families, they grocery shop, they get their hair cut and all the while they speak of the hope they have found in Jesus and the truth found in His Word. I’m thankful for how the Lord has shown me that I’ve somehow managed to do just that. I’m thankful He has shown me that ministry is not something you go to do but rather something you live. Here’s to 8 more beautiful years of simply living out my faith in a new home.
Goodbye little sanctuary. You were good to me.
[I wrote this post last week after moving out of the apartment. I am only now getting around to posting it.]
“When God’s people reach deep within and realize that evangelism is something they want to do, not just should do, the impact may be staggering.” -Unknown
It has been my hope through this series that readers will grasp the immense beauty of the gospel and begin to share it regularly. My hope with this post is to present evangelism in such a light that lesser affections are exchanged for greater ones and it becomes something that you want to do rather than should do.
Tips for Sharing
Tip #1- The place to begin is to spend time meditating on the beauty of the gospel until your affections are stirred by this gloriously good news. You will never speak of something if you don’t love it. We naturally speak of the things we love. If you don’t know where to begin to bathe yourself first in the gospel, check out my resources listed below.
Tip #2- Learn how to articulate the gospel. Practice sharing it with friends. Learn it so well you can concisely cover each major point in about 2 minutes. I didn’t share for years because I didn’t know how to adequately put it in words.
Tip #3- Establish in your heart that the response of the hearer is not your responsibility. That job belongs to the Holy Spirit. You are simply called to share the truth often and let God do the rest.
Tip #4- Stop viewing evangelism as merely a means to keep people out of Hell. This approach is motivated primarily by guilt and will not yield lasting results. The real issue is that God is not being worshipped and He rightly deserves the worship of all creation.
Tip #5- Going along with Tip #4, we should be motivated by the fact that the gospel really is the hope for the world. We have access to ancient truths. We have the Spirit of God dwelling inside of us. And it is not just good news for folks’ eternities but for their lives now. The more I delve in the gospel, I realize that for believer and unbeliever alike, sin brings destruction to our lives. Jesus offers to rescue all people from those destructive ways and we get to take part in that.
Tip #6- You don’t have to share the whole gospel every time you share. Sometimes people need to hear about the damaging effects of the Fall. Sometimes they need to hear about God’s greatness. Sometimes they need to hear of the future hope that awaits them. Sometimes, they need to see that Jesus is the perfection to cover their blemishes. Begin listening to your friends as they speak and identify which parts of the gospel they need to hear that day.
Tip #7- Keep a Sharing Log. Write down who you share with each week. This has helped me keep track of what has been shared with friends and also how frequently or infrequently I am actually sharing the gospel. If I go a whole month without sharing then I know I need to re-prioritize how I’m spending my time.
Tip #8- Preach the gospel to your believing friends when you realize they are not living in light of the gospel. This practice has helped me learn to articulate it more easily when I am around strangers or unbelievers.
Tip #9- Just as learning a language takes time, fluency in the gospel takes time as well. I am still not fluent in the gospel and can get discouraged when I realize I can’t articulate it to meet the current needs of a friend. God gently reminded me recently that fluency takes time but I am making progress and should continue to wrestle and practice and stumble along until one day I will be fluent in the gospel.
Tip #10- Force yourself out of your comfort zone regularly. I started going to the local park with a friend attempting to engage strangers in gospel conversations. We first walk around in prayer, asking the Holy Spirit to guide our steps to where He is working in the park. We then approach random strangers and get right to the point by asking if they’re interested in discussing spiritual things. From there we proceed to ask about their spiritual background and use that as a launching point to share the gospel. If a person says they’re not interested, we politely thank them for their time and move on. We have been rejected several times but surprisingly we have had equal chances to chat with people. Most of those gospel conversations have ended with the person(s) telling us that what we’re doing is good and they appreciate us talking with them. I have also learned that the more I do it, the less nervous I become. I have also found that if I choose to not think about what I’m about to do and just do it that it’s much easier.
I leave you with one last thought. I was listening to this song by All Sons & Daughters one night. I was thinking of the phrase in that song, “You spoke life into my lungs.” I was thinking about how God spoke the word light and light came into being. He spoke land and land appeared. He spoke words and our world was created. As humans we are limited in our creations because we have to use God-made materials to create things. When we share the gospel, it is the only time that we imitate our Creator who speaks creation into existence. In our speaking the gospel, if it takes root in a heart, a new life is formed and we were able to participate in the making of a new creation. Who doesn’t want to be a part of that?
Resources I Recommend
Series #1- I would hands down recommend that you start with Jeff Vanderstelt’s Gospel Fluency talks. There are 5 separate videos covering about 5 hours of teaching but it is excellent. I’m going through the videos for a second time and my affections have been stirred for the gospel. In the first 2 videos, he mainly spends 2 hours painting the most glorious picture of the gospel. The last 3 videos are more practical in nature and he shares how he shares the gospel in all areas of life or how he has learned/practiced gospel fluency. I know it’s a big time commitment but your soul will be better if you watch this series of videos.
Series #2-Threads Series by David Platt He breaks down the gospel into different threads and gives examples of how you can begin to naturally weave those threads into everyday conversations without being an awkward weirdo.
Series #3- Recovering Redemption Series by Matt Chandler starts here. Again, this series is basically a couple months of sermons based on the gospel. Really all of his sermons are great if your affections need to be stirred by the gospel. He also does a really great job of incorporating humor into his sermons as well as interesting insight onto present day culture.
Book #1- Stop Asking Jesus Into Your Heart by J.D. Greear
Book #2- The Explicit Gospel by Matt Chandler (This book covers the same basic content as his Recovering Redemption series.)
Book #3- Questioning Evangelism by Randy Newman - an interesting approach to evangelism in where the sharer is encouraged to listen a lot and ask thought provoking questions to the hearer.
Book #4- More Than a Carpenter by Josh McDowell - a great place to start if you’d like to learn apologetics.
Book #5- Epic by John Eldredge - a great book to help you begin to see the theme of the gospel in popular books and movies.
Additional Resource Ideas
-Find Gospel centered songs and hymns
-Look for the themes of the gospel in literature and movies. I read a lot of fantasy fiction because the books often stir my affections for the gospel.
Let us end this series with this last anthem song, 'With Everything.'
As usual, if at any point in the series you have questions or comments you can either comment below or email me at lookingforgreenergrasses@gmail.com Please correspond with me also if you have gospel related topics you would like me to address.
How does a person write a blog post that has been six years in the making? How does one make it neat and concise and interesting and cohesive? How does one cover the wide range of emotions and thoughts? These are the questions that have delayed the writing of this post. This is now my 3rd try at attempting this feat.
Many of you know my heart was sparked with a passion and great desire to live overseas almost 6 years ago. If you remember, I first wrote of my new possible adventure here. All those years ago, a friend of mine suggested that I move to the ‘Land that I Love.’ My immediate response was the feeling that I needed to throw up at the terrifying idea. Thankfully, that feeling was quickly replaced with my mind racing with the possibilities of me actually living there. Later, the same friend suggested I go visit the place because I would never want to live in a place until I had experienced it. I visited and then visited again and then visited 3 more times and each time my love for the land and people grew. I came to the realization that perhaps I had been knit together in my mother’s womb for this very purpose of living and loving in this land.
For 5 long years I ached with longing to live among the people of this great country. There were many days that I desired to live there more than I had ever desired anything else in my life. I became quite frustrated at the many instances when my desires were thwarted. As the aforementioned blog post covers, I eventually found an open door and walked through it. The company I applied to is very thorough in their screening of applicants and has many steps in a quite lengthy process. During this process I have had to walk through 8 additional doors which happened to all be open as well. The previous sentence was short and sweet but the 9-door process was not. It has already been about 17 months since I stepped through the first door and there have been many tears and frustration as I jumped through the required hoops.
In spite of those tears and frustration and 17 long months, I find myself sitting in my apartment with packed boxes all around and the walls looking all too bare. I’m moving in with my parents in a few days in order to spend some extra time with them before some training and my overseas departure. I’m also wrapping up work in Cookeville as I wrap up time in this sweet little sanctuary of an apartment. You know, no biggie, just making several major life changes all at once to keep things a little spicy in my world.
With the major life changes, the journey has already been filled with a complexity of emotions. I’ve been overwhelmed at trying to tie up loose ends so I can move to another country for several years. It’s been hard and exhausting trying to sort through the entirety of my possessions and make decisions about whether to sell, keep, or give away every single item I own. I’ve also had little freak out moments where I remember that in a few short months I will no longer be living on this continent. I have likewise been sobered by all the impending lack of certain sweet joys from life in America as well as the new language, culture shock, and loneliness that lie ahead. I’ve been saddened by the “lasts” that I’ve already been experiencing:
Last 4th of July
Last trip to Cummins Falls
Last Book Club Hobo Pack/S’more Evening
Last Book Club Pool Party
Last time I’ll see this friend for a while or hug that friend
Last rent check
Last week in my apartment
Last niecphews and sister sleepovers at my apartment
Last [insert 5 billion lasts from the next few months]
All of these have been sad and yet even more sweeter because of the finality of each one and my eagerness to drink in these joy moments. On the other hand, I am eager and excited about all the “firsts” that await me. How exhilarating that I have the opportunity to learn a new language, to be submerged in another culture, to love the love-starved, to have experiences that my Stateside counterparts can only read about, to find new favorite foods and parks and places and people.
During this emotion-filled transition season, I wanted to give some insight into what I have been feeling as well as let me friends know how best to help me during this time. I don’t tend to express my emotions externally but it doesn’t mean that I don’t feel things deeply. I have a lot on my plate right now and as such I must say no to many good things so I can say yes to the best things. My family and closest friends take top priority so I may have to decline a chance to hang out with some of you. I’m also pretty sure the next 2 months are going to zoom by and I don’t want to get to the end exhausted from trying to do too much. Rather, I want to drink in all the quality time that I can.
I also realize that many people want to bless me. Currently, physical gifts are stressful since I have to eliminate, eliminate, eliminate. I already have so much stuff that I’m trying to be wise about what I keep and what I purge. There are some items that I want/need overseas that I do not currently own. I am working on an Amazon wish list with these items for those who would like to bless me with a gift but don’t want to cause me further stress. I’m also going to be traveling quite a bit over the next few months so a gas card or two would be appreciated.
Other cheap and more practical ways you can really bless me is by writing me a note of encouragement, praying for me, or becoming my cheerleader. Some days are hard and I’m discouraged by what I am leaving behind. Send me a note that reminds me of why I wanted to go in the first place. Pray for me and send me a text or an email telling me that you prayed and what you prayed. Be my cheerleader. I’ve talked with many people about my adventure but didn’t realize how discouraging most of these conversations have been until recently. I was explaining to my friend’s husband about my journey, where I am going and why and the need for light and love there. I expected his response to echo the typical response:
“Oh, you are a brave woman.” or
“Are you not scared?” or
“You be careful over there, especially as a single woman.” or
“That part of the world is volatile, are you not worried things could get out of hand?” or
“I bet your family is really sad.” or
“How are your parents doing?” or
“I’m really going to be sad when you’re gone.” or
“How long until you come back?” or
“Why can’t you just stay here and do the same kind of work? People need light here as well.” or
“You’re stupid for going over there.”
Instead, this gentleman became my cheerleader. He told me it was fantastic that I was going to that part of the world and that we should all be willing to go to those kinds of places. He said it was great that I was willing to go there and exciting at what I would get to experience. He helped to rekindle some of my former passion and remind me of my initial desire. I don't discount all of the concerns or pretend that life will be a cake walk but I need people who are willing to encourage me and remind me of the Good News and it's power to dissipate all darkness.
I’ll wrap up this post by giving a timeline:
-August 21: Moving from Cookeville to my parents’ house and finishing both jobs
-August 23-28: Conference about wrapping up well in the States with my new company
-August 28-29: Traveling
-September 1-October 12: Spending time with family, visiting friends, and traveling
-October 12-December 13: Cross Cultural Training for new company
-December 13-December 28ish: Holidays with family and final goodbyes
SAJIYH Part 9 - I Stopped Asking Jesus Into My Heart
My testimony
I grew up in a Christian home. My parents were faithful church-goers so every time the doors were opened, we were at church. My mom shared with me often about Jesus, sin, Heaven, and Hell. Each time she shared the implications of the gospel with me she asked if I wanted to follow Jesus. These conversations always made me uncomfortable and I always told her that I wasn’t ready. Then one night, I had a dream that I was about to be pushed off into Hell unless I did something. I awoke from the dream and knew from conversations with my mom that I had no power to save myself and I needed a savior. I prayed and told Jesus that I was a sinner and knew he had died on the cross to pay for my sins and that I wanted Him to save me.
Afterwards, my mom asked if I had been changed into a new creation. I was 8 at the time and didn’t really understand her question. It’s not like I had been living a partying life beforehand and now I wanted to gladly give up that lifestyle. I later struggled with assurance wondering if my salvation really took. As the years progressed, I found evidence of the Spirit working in my heart. I wasn’t perfect by any means but I did find that I had different desires than those around me at school. At 16, the Spirit challenged me that as a Christian, I needed to read the whole Bible to know what all the Christian life entails. I proceeded to read through the entire Bible in just over a year.
When I got to college, I went through a season of disobedience. I didn’t necessarily go wild and crazy in the eyes of the world but I did live for myself and developed some idols in my life. I chose music, boys, school, and work over God. I had an addiction to music. I mention this here because although those things seem somewhat insignificant compared to the stuff some dabble in while at college, they were infinite sins against a holy God. It was treason for me to choose God’s stuff over God after all he had accomplished for me in the death of His Son.
During the summer between my sophomore and junior years, I went through my first boyfriend breakup. I was devastated. Yet in the midst of this, God spoke clearly to me, bringing random verses to my mind and yielding peace in the midst of heartbreak. He told me to “Trust in Me with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding,” and “My ways and thoughts are higher than your ways and thoughts,” and “I know the plans I have for you and they are plans of peace.”* Eventually through the break up, God used it to bring me back to Himself. I began to devour the Word again and to crave time with Jesus. A few weeks later, I read something that indicated that God was completely trustworthy and knew that I needed to surrender my life anew to Him telling Him He could do what He wished with my life. [On a side note, He does what He wishes with our lives anyway. It is up to us to choose to embrace and trust Him or to fight against and run from Him.]
Prior to this surrender, my walk with God had been unstable and resembled a roller coaster ride. Afterwards, I describe my walk as a slow and steady incline. I have since realized that my experience at age 20 was a milestone where all before it seemed like dimness compared to my new revelation of God. I have had a few other milestones of surrender and new revelation since then making my previous walk seem pitiful. Jesus is much more sweeter to me today than He was that night beside my bed as a child. May I only grow in the knowledge and worship of Him.
How I Have Failed/Grown in Evangelism
I’m not gifted in evangelism. God made me an introvert so conversations with strangers are painful for me. He also made me a thinker so even in conversations with friends, I am slow to speak because I’m trying to process what to say that will be most helpful. My friend Sindy calls this the introvert glaze. In spite of these seeming drawbacks, I am not excused from the Great Commission. I spent some time in 2003 doing a summer training hoping to grow in evangelism. I went with others in groups to the beach to share with strangers. I survived our beach trips because we were in groups but when left to myself, I had no idea how to start gospel conversations. I later went to Brazil to learn to do the same thing. I spent a lot of time with students there and again in groups shared a bit here and there. After Brazil, I attempted to apply the principles I had learned on the local campus. I went with another girl to the dorms in hopes of sharing with students. The following week my friend could not go and told me I should go by myself. I confess that I spent probably 45 minutes walking the hallways and sitting in the stairwell of the building trying to get up enough courage to knock on the doors of the girls we had met the previous week. I never gained the courage. I left and never went back.
The dorm experience was a major fail in my evangelism experience and it took me almost a decade to recover. Another fail from those days involved a lesson I had learned while in Brazil. While there, I learned that many Brazilians were opposed to Jesus because of the way His followers or pseudo-Christians had misrepresented Him. The staff we worked with encouraged us to live lives of love among the students, take a genuine interest in students and earn a right to be heard. Around the same time I heard the quote, “Preach the gospel at all times. Use words never when necessary.” I adopted this as my approach to evangelism: preach the gospel with my life and when opportunities came share with words. The problem is that I rarely took advantage of chances to share with words. These experiences led to much guilt in my life over not sharing my faith.
At some point I came across this quote by Thomas Chalmers, “We lose our addiction to lesser affections by being captivated by a greater affection.” I had already noticed this pattern in my own life that I wouldn’t change my bad habits until I KNEW that the flip side would bring me greater joy. I began in 2013 to pray and ask that God would make evangelism my greater affection. A few months later, I was issued an almost impossible challenge by some superiors to lead someone to Christ in a 4 month window and to keep a log of each time I share. This was a necessary step for me to continue down my desired path. [On a side note, I believe the challenge was a bit faulty because as I have already mentioned in this series, it is the Holy Spirit’s job to bring someone to faith, not mine. I decided to embrace the challenge anyway knowing that if I was to continue down this path by God’s design then He had someone in mind waiting to hear the gospel and be saved.]
That challenge was over a year ago, and I can proudly say that I have begun to see evangelism as a greater affection and have shared the gospel more frequently with friends, strangers, believers, and unbelievers. In addition, God did randomly bring a young man into my life who was “ripe and ready” to follow Jesus. In my next post I'll give some tips and resources that have helped me. The song for this post is 'Tear Down the Walls'
As usual, if at any point in the series you have questions or comments you can either comment below or email me at lookingforgreenergrasses@gmail.com Please correspond with me also if you have gospel related topics you would like me to address.
I haven’t written about airport adventures lately because the last 5 or 6 trips were ridiculously smooth. There were no delays, no missing bags, no missing students, no instances where I was at the wrong side of baggage claim. I think I got a little spoiled in the ease of airport trips. Today, however, things got back to the normal chaos.
I arrived at the airport at 10:45, fifteen minutes before the plane was scheduled to arrive. I have discovered a live air traffic control map which has tiny airplane icons with their respective flight numbers/airlines and their live position as they’re flying into Tennessee. This helps me know if my student’s plane is late since the arrivals board is only correct about 50% of the time. After I was there for 30 minutes and the map showed that my student’s plane had only barely reached Kentucky, I decided to ask about the actual arrival time from the Information Desk. They told me the plane should arrive 45 minutes late. I picked a nice cozy rocking chair and proceeded to read my book.
Around 11:45, I started watching the escalator. I saw a group come down but realized they were going to baggage carousel 8 and my student should be going to carousel 7. After another 20 minutes and no one had made their way to carousel 7, I returned to the info desk to make sure they weren’t stuck at the gate or something. Nope, the plane had landed at 11:46. I went to the airline desk and made sure this information was correct and that the bags had arrived as well. Yep. Everyone seemed to have retrieved their bags from carousel 8. WHAT?!?!?! Ugghhh. Remember what I said about the arrivals board being right only 50% of the time. I proceeded the frantic search for my student. I had him paged, I looked outside, inside, downstair, and upstairs. After searching for half an hour, I went back to the airline desk and asked for any info he could give on my student. He informed me that the student did not make that flight. Oh. Okay. Panic dissolved. I called my boss and she told me to see when the next flight from that city was to arrive. 5pm. She asked if I could just hang around Nashville for the next 4-5 hours and they would buy my lunch. Having nothing else on my agenda for today (except for, you know, packing up my whole apartment) I told her I could stay.
I got some food to go and found a shade tree to eat my lunch and continue reading my book. I then called a friend who lives a few miles from the airport and planned to meet at her house. Her husband is Korean so they treated me to a mid-afternoon snack of yummy Korean food. Around 4:00 I decided to check on the flight status to see if the 5:00 flight was still on time. It was. I headed back towards the airport around 4:30 so I would have enough time to get to the airport, get parked, and make the hike into the airport so I would be there waiting for my student a few minutes before 5. At 4:36 I was about 5 minutes from the airport and realized that I had left the folder with my student’s name and flight info at my friend’s house. Dang it. I turned around and tried to fly back to her house so I would be back in time for my student. Wouldn’t you know I hit every.single.stoplight and they stayed red for a whole hour five minutes. I managed to make it to my friend’s house to get the folder at 4:55. It took me TWENTY MINUTES to get to my friend’s house giving me FIVE MINUTES to travel back the same distance and park at the airport and hike all the way into the baggage claim area. I was beyond frustrated. I was fuming. Ugly things and thoughts and words were coming out of my heart. In the midst of it all, God was whispering to me to calm down it would be alright and I only needed to trust. I of course had a little hissy fit rather than calming. I made it back to the interstate and attempted to speed like a demon yet again. I made it a mile and then received the text:
“Come on home, he missed his flight in [insert his country].”
All that stressing and nasty, wicked heart lava spewing out because of my circumstances and God was right all along. He was taking care of things. He knew all along that there would be no student waiting scared and unafraid at the airport because I was a few minutes late. He knew that if I had chosen to trust Him, I would have remained calm, kept a steady blood pressure and seen that in the end there was no need for frustration or worry. Oh when will I learn this important lesson? I almost immediately thought of the verse that says “For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.”
The truth is, I was frustrated with God for allowing me to forget my folder and then to give me so many dadgum long red-lights. Why would He allow these minuscule inconveniences to happen? I can only guess that He wanted me to see the wicked things that were in my heart and the places where I choose to not trust Him. In the grand scheme of things, forgetting a folder and waiting at traffic lights are not that big of a deal. My reaction indicated otherwise.
I wish I could tell you that from that point on, my evening has been much more calm and peace filled, that my heart is spewing rose scented thankfulness and peace. I could tell you those things but it would be lies. I’ve been in a rotten mood all evening, wanting to throw my phone or computer or hit something. Everything has agitated me worse than normal. My heart continues to spew wickedness and anger and frustration. I want to confess this here because I want to be real and transparent about my struggles. I don’t want to ever be seen as the girl who “has it all together.” Rather, I want to be seen as the girl who is a wreck and is still dripping with sin but also the girl who is dripping with grace because of Jesus. Just one of my actions today deserve the full weight of God’s wrath yet He continues to grace me with breath. I’m thankful for Jesus who has taken all of my sin, even the load from today and given me His righteousness. I'm thankful that I don't have to be weighed down with the guilt and weight of my sin. I'm thankful I don't have to try to cover my sins with good works. I'm thankful I don't have to wallow for a week because of my sin hoping God will eventually decide to forgive me. I take comfort in the knowledge that tomorrow is a new day and His mercies are new every morning.
“But this I call to mind,
and therefore I have hope:
The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
‘The Lord is my portion,’ says my soul,
‘therefore I will hope in him.’”
-Lamentations 3:21-24 "Blessed are those whose lawless deeds are forgiven, and whose sins are covered; blessed is the man against whom the Lord will not count his sin." -Romans 4:7-8
Perhaps after all of these posts you’re wondering if anyone can be assured of salvation. After my post ‘So You Think You’re a Christian’, perhaps it has stirred up some things in your mind and you have these questions:
-What if a person prayed a prayer once asking Jesus into their heart, are they a Christian? Even if they have no evidence of fruit or repentance?
-Is the phrase, “Once saved always saved” accurate?
-Can a person lose their salvation?
-How do I explain fruitlessness?
-How do I explain a person who seemed to be following Jesus for several years but has since seemed to walk away from their faith? Are they still a Christian? Were they a Christian to begin with?
-What if someone counted the cost initially but has since decided Jesus wasn’t worth continued sacrifices?
-Where do I fit in to these questions? Am I a Christian? How can I be sure?
God wants us to have certainty. “I write these thing to you who believe in the name of the Son of God that you may know that you have eternal life” (1 John 5:13). According to J.D. Greear, “He changes, encourages, and motivates us not by the uncertainty of fear, but by the security of love.” Greear gave an example of his first repelling trip where he did not want to put his full weight on the ropes and harness until he knew it would hold him. Similarly, our faith will never really take off until we know that our resurrection is secure. We will never put our full weight on Jesus until we know that we are eternally secure.*
How does a person gain assurance of salvation? Again, Greear is helpful here. He gives two ways we can be sure we are saved. The first way is to look outside of self to what Christ has done. Our hope and assurance rest entirely on Jesus. “This is the gospel: when we trust in his name, we cease striving to earn heaven by drawing upon our own moral bank account; instead, we withdraw on his righteous account in our place.” If we are looking to our own works, righteousness, goodness, or a time we prayed a prayer, we are looking in the wrong place and will be unsure. John says, “I write these things to you who prayed the sinner’s prayer believe.” The point is not the prayer you prayed, but the present posture you are in.”
The second way to know we are saved is that believers have a new nature. As 1 Corinthians 5:17 says, we have become “new creations.” Matt Chandler says, “Without a heart transformed by the grace of Christ, we just continue to manage external and internal darkness.”*** John also says that those who have been born of God do not “keep on sinning.” We gain new desires and no longer want to follow the path of sin that leads to destruction. Greear gives this example: “you might imagine some vomit on the ground. None of us would require a list of rules keeping us from eating it. Why? Because we find it disgusting. Now, a dog has a totally different nature, with different desires. A dog would find that vomit as appetizing as we find it disgusting.” This does not mean that we never sin or become instantly perfect. It does mean that we view sin as something that is rebellion against the God who rescued us from it and as something that eventually destroys us anyway. Greear continues that we can’t love God and the things that grieve Him at the same time. When, as believers, we do start to go back to sin, the Holy Spirit gives us warnings to flee from it. And when we fail and fall, Jesus is there calling us back to repentance and back to resting on Him for our righteousness.**
The Bible exhorts us to examine and test and work out our salvation to make sure we are in the faith and Christ is in us.**** Here are some additional questions to help “test” yourself for salvation or someone else who is struggling with assurance:
1. Am I currently resting on Jesus as the payment for my sin?
**
2. Is there evidence of a regenerating work of the Holy Spirit in my heart? (The Holy Spirit only dwells inside of believers so this is a great indicator. See Romans 8:9-17)
3. Do I see a long-term pattern of growth in my Christian life?*****
4. Do I desire to and work at submitting to Christ’s Lordship and putting sin to death or am I simply ok with indwelling sin and continuing to be the “god” in my own life?
I want to end by quickly addressing the questions listed at the beginning of this post. Please feel free to leave comments or send emails for further clarifications on these issues.
-What if a person prayed a prayer once asking Jesus into their heart, are they a Christian? Even if they have no evidence of fruit or repentance?
You can look for evidence of the Spirit working in a person’s life but ultimately it is not up to us to judge whether or not another person is a Christian. That is something between that person and God. Based on this post and the ‘So You Think You’re a Christian’ post, I would wager that the person is not a Christian. Perhaps the person is merely in a season of extended disobedience and we simply can’t see the Spirit at work within our friends’ heart. As Greear says, we won’t be able to fully know if another is truly a believer until eternity. And we should not give up on someone because the only time we know God is no longer working in them is after their death.****** Either way, this person needs you to continuously point them back to the gospel and back to what Jesus has done. He is the only way to repentance and believer and unbeliever alike need to hear the gospel.
-Is the phrase, “Once saved always saved” accurate? Can a person lose their salvation?
Greear offers a better phrase, “Once saved, forever following.” He continues, “Salvation is a posture of repentance and faith toward Christ that you adopt at your conversion and maintain for a lifetime.”*******
To answer the second part, a person cannot “lose” their salvation. Our salvation is based entirely on Christ’s finished work. The work is finished. Our security is based on His performance, not on how well we can adhere to a bunch of rules. Furthermore, believers have been adopted as sons of God. Even in human adoptions, an adopted parent cannot choose to disown or disinherit their adopted child. There are many verses used by others to explain that others can lose their salvation but I am convinced that these verses refer rather to those who were never genuine believers. Instead the verses speak of those who either wanted to benefit from Jesus but not submit to Him or who saw the beauty of the gospel but rejected it anyway. They may even have played the part for a while but in the end were not new creations. If you would like to read more on this topic, here is a blog post that does a great job covering this point of view.
-How do I explain fruitlessness?
Based on my study of Scripture, fruitlessness is either the result of someone playing the part of Christian but not submitting to Him and thus a non-Christian or characteristic of a Christian who is immature or walking through a season of disobedience.
-How do I explain a person who seemed to be following Jesus for several years but has since seemed to walk away from their faith? Are they still a Christian? Were they a Christian to begin with?
See my response to the first question.
-What if someone counted the cost initially but has since decided Jesus wasn’t worth continued sacrifices?
See my response to the first question.
-Where do I fit in to these questions? Am I a Christian? How can I be sure?
If you’re wrestling with your own doubt, only you can determine if the Spirit is at work inside of you and if he is convicting you of sin. Don’t despair but instead, wrestle around until you gain assurance. I wrestled around with these ideas for a while trying to determine if I genuinely became a Christian at 8 or later at 20. I finally came to the conclusion that I truly chose to follow Jesus at age 8 evidenced by the Holy Spirit working in my heart. I also realized that we can have new revelations of God’s glory and new resolutions to lay our lives down for him that make past decisions/experiences appear dim in light of this newness.******** Greear likewise explains that salvation is like choosing to hop up into the lap of God, submitting to go wherever He chooses, and trusting that He will take us to Heaven. If at some point we begin to doubt, rather than looking back to the point where we hopped up into His lap, we should look instead at where we currently rest. “If you are right now resting in His arms, knowing when you began to rest is less important than that you are doing it now.” Likewise the book of John always uses belief in the present tense because belief is a continual thing rather than something we did once in the past.*********
I leave you with today's song which has helped solidify assurance of salvation in my own life. Enjoy 'Before the Throne.'
As usual, if at any point in the series you have questions or comments you can either comment below or email me at lookingforgreenergrasses@gmail.com Please correspond with me also if you have gospel related topics you would like me to address or if you have additional questions concerning assurance.
