Becoming Family

I’ve been spending a lot of time with the E family. A typical day with them ranges from about 6-12 hours. This seems like a lot but they really feel so much like family that it is really quite an enjoyable time. One day J and I went to their grandma’s home. 

We went there because her home has a bit of a garden which feels like a small escape from this big city. We spent the day doing a variety of things. One of those was picking mulberries. We had to stand on the roof of the shed to do so.

They also taught us a game called 5 stones. I think it is similar to the game, Jacks, we played as kids. In this game, someone drops the stones and then chooses a stone to pick up. That stone is tossed in the air while the person tries to grab a single rock and catch the falling rock. If the person is successful, she tries to toss the stone up in the air and tries to grab another rock. If unsuccessful, the turn passes to the next player. The goal is to see who can get the most stones.

In the second round, a person tosses the stone up in the air and tries to grab 2 stones. The third and fourth rounds involve grabbing 3 and 4 stones. In the final round, a person places their thumb and forefinger on the ground and tries to sweep a single stone through the goal of the thumb and finger while tossing a stone into the air and catching it. I was not very good at this game. 

After playing the game, they asked if we would like to take a nap. I jumped on the offer knowing it would be a long day. I’ve learned how to pace myself on these long language and culture days. I also think it is sweet that I feel comfortable enough around them to nap. After that, I called my family to talk to them for a few minutes. Then I skyped into a friend’s wedding. The wedding ended just as the sun was setting allowing them to break their fast. After dinner, we ended our day at the park drinking hot chocolate and tea.

On another day, J and I went back to the grandma’s house. They picked us up at our house around 10:30. When we got in the car, Little E said they had a surprise for me. Mrs. E was holding a shoe box with a white pigeon. They know my disdain for the winged creatures. Naturally I was was figuring out quick escape routes from the crowded car. They promised me the bird couldn’t fly because it’s wings had been cut. I told them to keep the thing away from me.

We had breakfast together. They had bought fresh bread from a bakery. It was a little warm, fluffy, crispy and delicious. After breakfast, I brought out some card games I had brought from home to see if they wanted to learn to play them. Mr. E told me I was too old to play games because most adults here don’t play games. I told him in America, lots of adults love to play games. We played Dutch Blitz together (or Nertz) and he joined in. In fact, the whole family loved playing the game and asked to play for hours. We eventually went inside because it was getting hot outside. The bird was just wandering around the living room but they kept it away from me. 

After a couple of hours, Mrs. E suggested we gather some more mulberries before the rain came in. We did this but between my headache, the heat, and some ongoing stomach issues, I started to feel bad. She asked if I wanted to take a nap so I did. It took a while for me to fall asleep and I only slept for 5-10 minutes. Nonetheless, I had some down time. I decided to get up and take some more medicine but I had to pass by the bird to do so. I debated on what to do for about a minute. Lucky for me, Little E came in and I asked her to hold the bird while I grabbed my medicine from the other room. Have I mentioned how the girls would hold the bird and hug and kiss on it? Gross. Don't those things carry diseases? Anyway as I stepped out into the living room where the bird had been, I stepped into something wet. I knew what I would find before I turned my foot over. Bird poop. Have I mentioned how much I despise birds?

After the nap, we played some more games and then got ready for dinner. They cooked on a barbecue for us and the food was delicious. After dinner, they let J and I take care of the dishes. This means we really are part of the family. We then sat out and talked for a while. The girls tried to teach their grandma how to say “my husband” in English. She could never get it right but their grandpa, who was mindlessly playing a game on his phone, memorized it in no time. 

We eventually made it home and discussed how the day had been a good one. J commented that we had passed the day pretty similar to how we would have passed a lazy day with family. I agreed.